Tears on the pillow case, body hits the floor your reaching out to me, and im begging you for more. Waterfalls down my face wanting it to end, but instead we pretend just begin again . We in a race I always end last place. End up in a place i don't want to be all I want is for you to be here with me. I want to take you on a ride. Journey to the top. Fight till my very last breath you know I'll never stop. I'll never stop because that's what they want. They want to see me fail. Watch me fall down on my face. I'm scared I'll be replaced. You'll push me to the side when all i want is to be by your side, but I know you don't want that. You rather do this alone no picture perfect moment, thats right no kodak. Memories fade, but here I still remain hoping that you'll see the girl the one who wants to change. Be who you want me to be, but I know I got to do this for me. You only got yourself in this world. I have to have me. I'm the only one who truly has my back; in fact I can't  call one person in this world my best friend.

Ain't it sad?

I know it's sad to say, but its the cold heart truth. My close friends seemed to be the ones holding the knife behind their back ready to attack. Stab me in the chest cut straight through. Lost trust, all faith didn't think I'd make it. I could no longer take it. No longer was I faking it. Waterfalls down my face wanting it to end. Tears on the pillowcase it's hard to play pretend. Such a cold, dark place I had to get through. It took awhile, but I finally saw light. No more waterfalls through the night. I lost sight in who I was, but then I found me. That girl I craved to be was always inside me. She came out of hiding. She was no longer scared. That strong girl came back, but this time prepared. Ready to go. Ready to take flight. Each and every night she put up a fight. Fight till the end, so there was no longer a reason to pretend. 


Brianna Abalos